Review: Madame Web

As I settled into my seat, popcorn in hand, eager anticipation filled the air around me. Marvel’s Madame Web promised a fresh perspective on the Spider-Man universe, a tantalising glimpse into the enigmatic backstory of a character shrouded in mystery. Little did I know that what awaited me on the silver screen would be a bewildering journey through a tangled web of missed opportunities and puzzling decisions.

The journey begins with a clumsy opener, set amidst the backdrop of 1970s Peru. Instantly, red flags are raised as the scene unfolds with junky direction and shoddy writing. We are introduced to our heroine, Cassandra Webb, and her absurd backstory involving spiders and spider-people. Fast forward thirty years, and Cassandra (played by Dakota Johnson) is now a paramedic in Boston, working alongside Ben Parker (Adam Scott), known to most as Peter Parker’s uncle—except in this peculiar iteration where all references to Spider-Man seem conspicuously absent.

It’s after a near-death experience that Cassandra discovers her newfound ability to glimpse into the future. This power leads her on a path to save the lives of three teenagers—Sydney Sweeney, Isabela Merced, and Celeste O’Connor—each targeted by a madman with unsettling ties to her past. What follows is a narrative that spirals into a convoluted mess, leaving me grasping for meaning amidst the chaos.

A script penned by four writers, including director SJ Clarkson, attempts to navigate this labyrinthine storyline, but instead of clarity, we are left with a sense of disorientation. The film’s setting, primarily Boston masquerading as New York, only adds to the confusion. As I watched, I couldn’t shake the feeling that this was studio filmmaking at its worst—a mishmash of ideas, hastily thrown together without regard for coherence.

Efforts to reposition “Madame Web” as a “suspense thriller” fall flat on their face. There’s a glaring absence of both suspense and thrills, with lacklustre network TV effects, uninspiring action sequences, and dialogue that feels forced and awkward. Characters are burdened with poorly written exposition, drowning any hope of emotional investment amidst the cacophony of disjointed scenes.

This was studio film making at its worst

One of the film’s most egregious missteps is the complete removal of any references to Spider-Man—a decision that feels both puzzling and detrimental to the narrative. An entire subplot involving Emma Roberts as Ben Parker’s pregnant sister, on the cusp of giving birth to a child whose name remains a mystery, only serves to add to the film’s jumbled nature.

As I reflect on the casting choices, I can’t help but feel they were misguided. Dakota Johnson, typically a capable performer, appears disengaged in her portrayal of Cassandra Webb. Her lacklustre performance adds to the film’s overall sense of lethargy. Sydney Sweeney, in an odd schoolgirl cosplay, and the rest of the ensemble struggle to inject life into characters burdened by an aimless plot.

As the film hurtles towards its climax, I find myself grasping for meaning amidst a flurry of nonsensical twists and turns. The absence of a cohesive vision becomes painfully apparent, with each scene feeling more disconnected from the last. Amidst this chaotic mess, the blatant product placement of Pepsi jars me from my immersion. Its uncomfortably frequent appearances, including a climactic set piece featuring the iconic Pepsi-Cola sign in Queens, serve as a jarring reminder of the film’s commercial interests.

Dakota Johnson’s lacklustre portrayal of Cassandra Webb encapsulates the film’s central struggle—a talented actor caught in a web of uninspired writing and direction. Her co-stars, though capable in their own right, are given little to work with, resulting in a collective effort that feels disjointed and unconvincing.

The absence of a cohesive vision becomes painfully apparent, with each scene feeling more disconnected from the last

As I exit the theatre, the tangled mess that is Madame Web lingers in my mind. It’s a cautionary tale of studio interference and creative missteps, a film that will likely be remembered more for its bewildering shortcomings than any genuine contribution to the superhero genre.

In the days that follow, I find myself pondering the film’s missteps, replaying scenes in my mind, trying to make sense of the tangled narrative. Perhaps, in the years to come, Madame Web will serve as a fascinating case study—a cautionary tale of how not to spin a superhero tale. But for now, all I’m left with is a 110-minute head-scratcher, a baffling string of question marks that remain unanswered, a film lost in its own web of missed shots and murky motives. And as I look back on my encounter with Madame Web, I can’t help but wonder—was there ever a clearer path, or were we destined to get caught in this tangled web from the start?

Verdict:

Marvel’s Madame Web had the potential to weave a captivating tale within the Spider-Man universe, but unfortunately, it finds itself ensnared in a web of missed opportunities and puzzling decisions. Despite attempts to offer a fresh perspective and delve into the mysterious lore of its titular character, the film falls short in delivering the expected superhero spectacle. With lacklustre action sequences, a disjointed narrative, and a notable absence of Spider-Man himself, Madame Web ultimately disappoints, leaving audiences yearning for the excitement and depth that could have been.